Tag : Courage

7 Tips to Fire Up The Adventurer in You and Banish Fear, Too!

Posted by Dr. Judy at 3:00 am

Are you a chicken? Is exploring your soul scary?
Or are you already a learner or seeker?

No time like the present to zestfully find out about yourself and what makes you tick? Notice I said “tick” but maybe you would like to discover why you get ticked off, too!

What does it take for you to sit a spell with yourself? To get real what you really WANT your life to look like from the inside out. To kick fearfulness to the curb. To become an explorer in your own life. To pack courage in your parachute and know you will land safely.

How about a coaching challenge. Cool ways for you to face your fears, look at them square in the eyes and yell, “Bring it on!” Even the scary stuff!

First, you need to get the cobwebs out of your brain. Get clear. Pinpoint exactly what you want to conquer. No one foot nailed down going around in a circle. I acted this out with a client this week, and he almost peed his pants laughing at me. Then he told me that was exactly what he was doing. His fearful brain and negative self-talk would not let him proceed. He didn’t have the right hammer to remove the nail to march forward, but he does now. And it’s your turn now!

Here are the 7 tips you need, your personalized hammer, to let your inner adventurer fly to the place where curiosity supplants fear:

1. Know where to start ~ Know your passions. Not sure? Then list 5 times in your life you were sublimely happy. What were you doing and feeling? What blows up your energy balloon? Noted curiosity researcher, Dr. Todd Kashdan, in his acclaimed book, Curious?, suggests you visit your local bookstore and see what sections intrigue you. If like photography, how could you challenge yourself? Get the new camera you have always wanted, take photos in a new place, or take a class. Set your inner explorer free!

2. Relax and imagine it ~ Close your eyes and visualize what you want. Paint a mental picture in your mind. Believe: ” I DO THIS!”. Fantasize what you want and there will be a greater likelihood you will check this off your bucket list. It may be as simple as cooking a new recipe or as challenging as climbing Mt. Ranier. What you focus on grows. Research indicates using “outcome simulation” makes it more likely you will achieve your goals. Fear or no fear. Think it, write it down, and keep picturing it in your mind until you do it. And get this. The more difficult it is, within reason, of course, the more likely you are to achieve it, according to esteemed motivational researcher, Dr. Heidi Halvorson.

3. Get expert advice ~ After you pinpoint your desired adventure, do fun homework. Scout the Internet, books, and people who have already accomplished your dream. Plunge into their fascinating stories. Be like a bird dog and hunt down how they did it. What flexible, creative strategies can you learn from them? Be specific. Get directions. Know before you go. Expect to fall down and scrape you knee. That is part of the fun of rock climbing and cycling. You pay to play and find joy along the way. Getting to the peak of your life’s desires…Ahhh!

4. Share your explorer plan ~ John Donne said, “No man is an island”. Think about your heading to a brave new world like Columbus. Can you imagine the discussion he had with his wife before he went? “Dear, I am headed off to…well…I hope the Spice Islands, but to tell you the truth, I might fall off the edge of the earth.” Any new endeavor is risky. To lessen fear, share you dream plans with others. Heck, you can even develop a “dream team” and share each others’ imaginations and goals. Shared support. You need encouragement from others who will add to your own energy, especially when roadblocks seem to get in your way.

5. Think big and little ~ OK. You have your dream blueprint in front of you. Maybe you are going to plan a trip to Bali. You have imagined in your brain. You see yourself on the beach. You have researched all the side trips you want to make. You began a vacation fund. You have told friends you WILL be accomplishing this by a set date. Now what? Here’s a fun side trip. You learn to develop a new Mindset every day about little things in life. Why? According to Dr. Kashdan, “Finding novel sensations in the everyday hits a reset button”. How? By changing your daily routine. Go to a new coffee shop. Take a different way to work, jog in a new location. In this manner, you put your brain on alert and exercise it. Doing this gives more muscle power to your big Bali trip. And it’s fun! Conscious awareness of nuance puts your bran in sharper focus. Cool!

6. Embrace the pain ~ Allow yourself to fail, feel the fear, get off track, but know this is normal. For example, you are ready to go to Nepal, and your Mom gets sick. I know this one! But dear Mom’s are worth putting the skidders on your almost there explorations. Life intervenes with stuff, and you need to acknowledge it. You have to postpone your trip. Big deal. Your world does not end. It morphs. It’s life. So blame what! Keep your dream, just postpone it. Yes, you might feel uneasy feelings, but it is these scrapes and bruises that add to your resilience. Maybe you want to run a marathon and pull a muscle. It hurts like hell and you are sore, but know you will another marathon. No pain no gain many times while you explore. Even scars can be positive reminders of your relentlessly moving forward. Smile and think of the stories you have to tell.

7. Nix the naysayers ~ Your own fearful negative self talk as well as the Doubting Thomases who want to rain on your parade. Think of Mother Theresa when everyone told her she could not feed thousands of starving people. Tenaciously, (and you sure as heck need to stretch your tenacity muscle to be an intrepid explorer) she marched on. She had a vision. She made plans. She made them happen. She dodged bullets on so many levels. Stick to your guns. Ask for the support you need. Go for it!

Did you have fun closing your eyes thinking about the fabulous adventures waiting to appear on your radar screen? How many dreams did you add for Bucket List?

There’s no better time than now. “It’s your life, live it well!” my old radio mantra. Hope you included me in your dreams and plans. Your did read what I said about side kicks adding to your adventure, right ;)

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And speaking of adventure, have you taken a vicarious trip with me to Cuba? Hope so.

See the Cubans’ amazing spirit and beautiful scenery in my book:
Photo Adventures in Cuba ~ Unlock Your Power of Positivity!
Now a best-seller on Amazon ~ Kindle

I’d love to hear from you!
Just send me your questions, and I will answer in a future blog.
You can also connect with me on facebook, LinkedIn, or twitter
www.facebook.com/drjudykrings

Take the “Am I Confident?” Quiz

Posted by Dr. Judy at 3:10 am

© 2011 Dr. Judy Krings

“If I just had more confidence I would ___________________________.
How would you fill in the blank?

Or maybe you’re one of the lucky ones who is already sure of yourself,
willing to take a risk. But I bet you stubbed your toe along the way.

Confidence has a learning curve. You don’t just wake up with it.
It graces your existence after you take action in difficult situations.
You need to get comfortable with “Ms. Failure” and invite her into your
life! Be supportive and ask her what she wants and needs to be morphed
into “Ms Success.” Remind her fear and anxiety diminish when she
changes her mindset to one of positive possibilities! Then goes for to gold.

A new belief system and new positivity patterns take practice.
You can start with:
“This is really difficult, but I find ways to conquer and get what I want!”
“I learn from my failures and celebrate my successes.”
“Even when adversity slaps me in to face, I know I am a winner!”
Take the fun “Am I Confident? Quiz” and see how you score:

1. Do I know what my dreams, purpose, and values are?
Am I currently there? If not, am I curious about my potential?

2. Am I focused, motivated, and tenacious to push forward in my
life even when my train derails and I fail?

3. Am I flexible with myself? Do I accept my foibles without over-reacting
emotionally. Do I feel in control?

4. Am I optimistic? Do I let negative things take me to the ground, or
do I know the sun will come up tomorrow?

5. Am I aware of my potential? Do I know my strengths and maximize
them to forge ahead? Do I accept my weaknesses?

6. Am I willing to strap on courage and tackle scary life events?
Do I zestfully look forward to new opportunities?

7. Do I thrive on risks and have a “Bring it on!” attitude about the unknown?
Do I look at life as challenges I can meet?

How did you score?
What is the first step you can take to joyfully wear your golden tapestry of triumph?
Not sure? Well, this coach would love to walk you through the courage door!

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P.S. The photo here showcases the Puerto Vallarta Fliers. Talk about courage!

Speaking of courage, want to see how Cubans thrive, not just survive?
Check out my new book on Amazon ~ Kindle

I’d love to hear from you!
Just send me your questions, and I will answer in a future blog.
You can also connect with me on facebook, LinkedIn, or twitter
www.facebook.com/drjudykrings

7 Character Strengths Tips to Well-Being and How To Pay It Forward

Posted by Dr. Judy at 3:00 am

© 2011 Dr. Judy Krings

Want to live positive psychology “the good life?” Then you need to identify and
empower your 24 character strengths to anchor well-being. Time to enrich your
life with less work and more play!

What Does Positive Psychology Mean To You?

Simply defined, as one client said to me the other day, “Before coaching, I asked
myself, “Is this all there is? I just want to be happier. When I asked her what
happier looked like to her, her light bulb moment flashed! “I want a good life.
I want more fun. I want more time for myself and time to go to volunteer and
make the world better.” BINGO! Then and there she set goals to achieve a more
upbeat and fulfilling life.

Positive psychology harvests all your sparkling facets. You define what a
“good person” means to you. You dive into your strengths and virtues. Want
to know a few?  Capacity to love and be loved, courage, curiosity, forgiveness,
tenacity, gratitude, social intelligence, and critical thinking. At the community
level: civility, altruism, work ethics, tolerance, and nurturance.

Here are 7 tips to help you understand your strengths, win at well-being, and
pay your wisdom forward:

1. Expand and open your mind to learning new perspectives and gain
mind-expanding personal insights. Take the Values in Action Survey (VIA) 
at www.viacharacter.org. Find your strengths. Remember none is better than
another. The top 5 are called your Signature Strengths as you may use these more
often. And don’t be shocked if they don’t seem to fit. My first one is Appreciation
of Beauty and Excellence. When I saw this I thought. “How shallow is that! Why
couldn’t I have had a ‘good’ one like courage?” Then it hit me. No matter how bad
my day seemed, if I paused to look at art and nature, I could cope with just about
anything. I was sold on strengths then and there.

2. Feel your optimism and resilience expand as you understand your
strengths lead you to well-being. When life is forcing you to eat a crap
sandwich, look to your strengths. For instance, if you tell yourself, “Nobody
listens to me!”, ask yourself, “Am I a good listener? Am I expecting too much?”
Ask yourself, “Which strength do I choose to use to get people to listen?” Perhaps
its courage to ask others if they would please sit awhile and hear you out.

Look at your 24 strengths as treats you give yourself. Like a tasty hot fudge sundae
with 24 toasted pecans on top. YUMMY. Strengths sweeten your lifeand change
your perspectives.

3. Savor how strengths help you with direction and decision-making.
Maybe you need to call upon your patience strength to deal with a difficult boss
or an unhappy partner. Maybe you need to look your persistence strength in the
eye to empower you to get a job done.

4. Capture your confidence strength.  Know it is a by-product of action.
Use your strengths in a planned and organized way. Add other strengths like
optimism to make your journey easier. Be grateful to yourself and others who
have helped you along the way.

5. Generate zest as you achieve your very best! Celebrate your victories.
Feel your positive energy pump you up as you win at well-being. It’s OK to be
humble, but celebrating success leads to more happiness.

6. Breathe in fulfillment and meaning when you engage your strengths,
especially when your goals look difficult. Pile on positivity every time you
strap on a strength. Want more fun? Get a partner to help cheer and mentor you.
Remind yourself of how joyful you will feel whenyou run across the finish line.

7. Applaud your mindful awareness.  Know your strengths guide your
way through life. Pull your strengths out of our quiver. Be patient and hopeful
as you pull back your strength arrows. Shoot their positivity to help you hit the
bull’s eye. Want to make this fun? Draw a target on a piece of paper. Write your 24
strengths inside your target. Get creative. Let your inner kid out to play. Throw a
dart (careful with your aim!) and see which strength you nailed. Challenge yourself
to use that strength for a day.

Remember if you want to achieve something get out your VIA results and take a
gander at which strength the best serve you. Really stop and you will see them
jump right out at you. You might also do what I do. Memorize your top strengths.
Print out your list of 24 so you can grab it at a weak moment when you need some 
help move you forward. They are one terrific life vest, so always kept them close
to your chest!

If you operate in the business world, check out the Gallop StrengthsFinders2
assessment. Engaging strengths at work helps you become a better leader,
enhances skills, energizes your performance.

Think about your favorite strengths stories? I especially love when you tell me
you piggy backed strengths and use a whole constellation of them at once. Or when
you have fun with your strengths and make up a new one designed especially for
you.That’s really fun! One if mine id “Gardenator”. Why? When I am in my garden,
my mind roams free and gives rise to creativity!

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If you’d like to hear uniquely inspiring strengths stories and savor gorgeous
photos, go to http://www.coachingpositivity.com/photo-adventures-in-cuba/
and take a look at my new book, “Photo Adventures in Cuba ~ Unlock Your Power
of Positivity”. You can also get my blog delivered to your email and score a copy
of my free Ebook on how to rev up your relationship.

Thanks for being my positivity partner!

Seredipity Do Dah ~ Something Even Better Comes Along

Posted by Dr. Judy at 3:00 am

© 2011 Dr. Judy Krings

Did you ever read a quote and serendipitous synchronicity arose?
Almost like magic, someone sprinkles fairy dust. You pause.
Wham! Instantaneously, you see a way to use that quote.

I had just read this quote: “On the way to what you planned to happen,
something even better came along.” Janice Endique

What had I planned? To finish cleaning out my freezer.
It unceremonious bit the dust depositing water all over the floor.
My trusty hook rug sucked up the mess, but all the contents bit the dust.
What a stinky fuss. I was on my way to the freezer, when I stopped to
gaze into my garden. I had to muster up courage to tackle the freezer.
I needed a spoonful of beauty.

And there she was! I tiny mama bird was doing her darnest to ram
a too-long twig into my new sunny yellow-roofed birdhouse.
Fearlessly, the pounded away, over and over. For some bizarre reason,
she inspired me to sing the music to “Camp Town Races.”

“Birdie, Birdie bang the hole,
Do-dah, do-dah,
Birdie Birdie you got soul,
Oh do-dah day!

Bang bang away,
Bang bang away,
You never gave up, you have such pluck,
Your babies will thank you some day!”

And the birdie?
Tender tenacious mite, she finally got it right!
Who said the twig was too big?
How about you? What quote has left you singing a song?
What frivolous fun play will you take advantage of today?

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I love your feedback and comments.
You can reply right here on this blog!
Make me smile and tell me about your adventures.

And want more adventure? Grab a copy of my exciting, fun, and exotic
traveling with your strengths print book, kindle, or E-book at
http://www.coachingpositivity.com/photo-adventures-in-cuba/

How Do You Spell Father?

Posted by Dr. Judy at 3:00 am

© 2011 Dr. Judy Kring

What name do you call the man who fathered or parented you?
Dad, Pops, Daddy, Father… 3, 4, 5, 6 little letters that spell out gigantic strengths.
Nurturing, courage, vitality, wit and wisdom, loving, generous, kind, thoughtful…
I bet your list goes on.

He’s your advocate, teacher, admirer, and the man who always has your back.

This is Mom’s most cherished photo of Daddy.

After a terrible car accident and three hospital stays, it took my emaciated daddy
ten brave months before heaven called. I was 26 when he died. Serendipitously,
or was it divine intervention, I was back in Delaware working at the time.
Daddy gave me the gift of being with him before his last good bye.

Daddy wasn’t perfect, but who is? He was my hero, anyway. I still remember him
telling me if I wanted to play basketball at 5’1″,  I’d need to run faster,  shoot from
almost center court, and getup when the Amazon gals elbowed me to the ground.

How’s that for a great life lesson? I remembered it well, when I played college
basketball, the shortest one in the conference.

This one’s with love for you, Daddy.
Happy Father’s Day!

Have you told your dad or father figure you love him?
I bet you have or will, even if you are looking up into the heavens, along with me.

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P.S. Judy loves to hear your comments.
Feel free to send her questions you may have!
You can also connect with Judy on Facebook, LinkedIn, or follow her on Twitter.
http://www.facebook.com/drjudykrings
Pre-Order a copy of her new book NOW! Visit: www.coachingpositivity.com
“Photo Adventures in Cuba ~ Unlock Your Power of Positivity”