Tag : Values

5 Tips to Quit Making Excuses

Posted by Dr. Judy at 3:00 am

© 2011 Dr. Judy Krings

Do you make excuses?

If things go wrong, do you “complain and explain,” to use my
husband Ken’s words. Do you look for and find reasons to justify
your decisions? Bet you know people who live this theme every day.

I read this fascinating quote from “The StoryPeople,” and
it put my neurons on fun alert. Title: Really Good.
“I don’t have a whole lot of excuses for what’s gone wrong with my life,”
she said. “But the ones I do have are really good.”

As a shrink and coach, I’m an analyzer. I love to dig into
why certain weeds incessantly try to bloom in my garden.
Even my license plate reads “Analyze.” Why?
My curiosity strength is one of my signature strengths.
I love to discovery. Maybe that’s why I love NCIS on TV.

Why do you make an excuse?
Maybe you don’t want to do something, so tell a little white lie
to get out of it. Research relays the average person (whoever that is!)
lies many times a day. No kidding!

I’ll fess up. I hate to hurt feelings. An excuse might pop up
if I need to change my plans. I project others will be disappointed,
and I hate believing that. Excuses are like potato chips. Some days
you can’t get enough of them. But do you like all the pounds they
pile upon your positivity bones?

Here are 5 tips to dump your wagon of whining, making excuses, woes:
1. State the facts and shut up!
Ken’s words again. A bit gruff sounding when you first hear them ring
in your ear, but think about it. Which seems better to you: “Hi, Jane.
I know we made plans for Sat., but I need to cancel. I am disappointed.
I would love to reschedule.”  Versus: “Hi, Jane, I really do wish we could
get together Saturday, but, ah, I need to take the cat to the vet, then do errands
I hadn’t planned on, then I need to make some phone calls I have put off,
but so sorry, and hope you can forgive me, and I really mean it…Blah blah.

2. Pause to remember to live your values.
Honesty, integrity, and authenticity are strengths cementing your reputation.
Brings to mind one of my favorite coaching questions,
“How do you want to show up?”

3. Humor is OK!
“Susie, I got caught up and am busier than a 3-armed paper hanger.
Could we reschedule so I can really enjoy our time together?”
Remember the old “Carol Burnett” show? Carol would always be yelling,
“Mama, will you just shut the hell up?” No, it’s not nice to attack others,
but the point is to learn to be assertive. Say what you need openly.
But yes, please be kind!

4. Let go of past mistakes.
They were growth opportunities. Be grateful and appreciate yourself.
Identify what is right about wonderful you, not grieve over what is wrong.
Celebrate with positive self-talk, “I feel good when I tell it like it is. I am
aware of the feelings of others and am respectful, but I stay true to myself.”

5. No guilt trips allowed!
Guilt is like rocking in a rocking chair. It’s something to do, but it doesn’t
get you anywhere. Be grateful and appreciate life. If someone lays a guilt
trip on you, remind yourself, “I am not responsible for how you hear or
translate what I kindly say.” Boundaries are essential.

Maybe excuses hit home because holidays are approaching.
“Overwhelm” seems to be the word of the day. Remember,
“Too much to do!” starts with you. Self-care is essential.
Is that you I see stopping to organize and prioritize?
Getting out the red pen to cross off some unnecessary items?
Still having a problem? Flash me an email. I’ve got a gorilla and
a black grand-dog cock-a-poo, Fido, who will happily chase them away!

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Thanks to all of you who have purchased my new book,
“Photo Adventures in Cuba ~ Unlock Your Power of Positivity”
for Thanksgiving and Christmas gifts. It’s packed with heart-warming
stories and picturesque photography.

Want more adventure?  Don’t forget to take a look at my new book…
“Photo Adventures in Cuba ~ Unlock Your Power of Positivity”
Click here to take a peek!

I’d love to hear from you!
Just send me your questions, and I will answer in a future blog.
You can also connect with me on facebook, LinkedIn, or twitter
www.facebook.com/drjudykrings

YIPPEE! A Heart-warming Positive Business Leadership Story

Posted by Dr. Judy at 3:00 am

© 2011 Dr. Judy Krings

Fed up with negative reports about business greed?

Need a heart-warming positive psychology leadership
coaching story snopes.com says is true?

Want to hear GREAT news about a company who changes
the lives of our returning wounded soldiers?
Here are feel good character strengths in action.

Be proud to be an American!

http://www.snopes.com/politics/military/ping.asp

Is that you I see waving the red, white, and blue?

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P.S. Judy loves to hear your comments.
Feel free to send her questions you may have!

You can also connect with Judy on facebook, LinkedIn, or follow her on twitter
http://www.facebook.com/drjudykrings

Visit: coachingpositivity.com
Score a copy of her new book NOW:
“Photo Adventures in Cuba ~ Unlock Your Power of Positivity”

How Do You Spell Father?

Posted by Dr. Judy at 3:00 am

© 2011 Dr. Judy Kring

What name do you call the man who fathered or parented you?
Dad, Pops, Daddy, Father… 3, 4, 5, 6 little letters that spell out gigantic strengths.
Nurturing, courage, vitality, wit and wisdom, loving, generous, kind, thoughtful…
I bet your list goes on.

He’s your advocate, teacher, admirer, and the man who always has your back.

This is Mom’s most cherished photo of Daddy.

After a terrible car accident and three hospital stays, it took my emaciated daddy
ten brave months before heaven called. I was 26 when he died. Serendipitously,
or was it divine intervention, I was back in Delaware working at the time.
Daddy gave me the gift of being with him before his last good bye.

Daddy wasn’t perfect, but who is? He was my hero, anyway. I still remember him
telling me if I wanted to play basketball at 5’1″,  I’d need to run faster,  shoot from
almost center court, and getup when the Amazon gals elbowed me to the ground.

How’s that for a great life lesson? I remembered it well, when I played college
basketball, the shortest one in the conference.

This one’s with love for you, Daddy.
Happy Father’s Day!

Have you told your dad or father figure you love him?
I bet you have or will, even if you are looking up into the heavens, along with me.

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P.S. Judy loves to hear your comments.
Feel free to send her questions you may have!
You can also connect with Judy on Facebook, LinkedIn, or follow her on Twitter.
http://www.facebook.com/drjudykrings
Pre-Order a copy of her new book NOW! Visit: www.coachingpositivity.com
“Photo Adventures in Cuba ~ Unlock Your Power of Positivity”

Radio Positive Psychology Coaching Tips Inspire

Posted by Dr. Judy at 3:00 am

© 2011 Dr. Judy Krings

Have you ever been on the radio? Or do you listen to talk radio?
It is my pleasure to do both. We’ve all gone out separate ways now,
but here is a blast from WCUB’s past: Radio host, Kyle Kristofer VanLanduyt,
Dr. Stacey Soeldner, me, and radio owner, Lee Davis. We rocked if I do say so
myself! The best was we all laughed our butts off.

I have often been blessed with grateful, generous folks who zip me a sweet email,
post kind kudos on social media, or even give me a call like a man did after one of
my three recent radio shows I appeared on.

I often wonder, “What was their greatest take-away pearl of wisdom?”  Talk about
an answer to my prayer. There is nothing I enjoy more than knowing positive
psychology coaching struck a happy, love-of-learning chord with a valued listener.

The email below came from an adorable listener, “Pond Girl:”

Judy,
I was having a very, very frustrating afternoon so I took a break and treated myself
by listening to your show with Sallie Felton, “A Fresh New Start.”
Well it was a treat to listen to!
Here are some of the highlights of the show that really hit me personally:
-Speak up
-Strength spotting
-Don’t give up
-Your life is yours
-What are you good at?
-Strengths drive talents and natural ability
-3 good things to 1 bad (Fredrickson’s Positivity ratio)
-One new thing you saw in a day to savor
-Appreciate beauty
-Exploring
-Be ok with uncertainty
There were a lot of other things that I found very interesting, but I could not write
that fast! I resolve that I will listen to show again.
Thank you for taking the time to share your knowledge with others.
Love you! ~ Pond Girl

Want to share the fun? Go to www.coachingpositivity.com and listen
to the radio show. Your ears deserve a good jolt of upbeat treat!
And check out my new book, too – a double-dip of delight and no calories!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

P.S. Judy loves to hear your comments.
Feel free to send her questions you may have!

You can also connect with Judy on facebook, LinkedIn, or follow her on twitter.
http://www.facebook.com/drjudykrings

Pre-Order a copy of her new book NOW! Visit: www.coachingpositivity.com
“Photo Adventures in Cuba ~ Unlock Your Power of Positivity”

Fat Cat Marley’s Treadmill Triumph!

Posted by Dr. Judy at 3:00 am

© 2011 Dr. Judy Krings

Do you have a treadmill? How often to you put it to good use? 
Is “exercise” a four-letter word?

 Meet Marley, my best friend Cheryl’s creatively possessive kitty. 
This parked pussy cat has the purrr-fect solutions for a treadmill not in action: 
Bird watch, take a rest, and leave exercise to all the rest.

Poor Marley, he has body dysmorphism issues.
He uses denial to deal with his weight issues. 
Please don’t be telling him there’s more than one way to skin a cat.
He’s very sensitive. Taking care of himself has not been on his radar screen.
I tried to coach him a bit on his values, but he ignored me, licked his paws and
groomed himself instead. At least he still has some pride.

But wait…I think I caught him…OMG…Yep, he did it!  
He mustered his courage, jumped up, and turned on the treadmill switch.

All life changes begin with a decision to take that first step.
Then take it! Even if you have four legs.

So what’s stopping you from getting your tread on the mill?